What are you doing when the project indicates it wants to connect to the server? Can you provide a picture of your settings, the information you have provided is too limited to enable any kind fo comment. We've certainly never heard of such a scenario happening.
Open your project file and ensure that you have a key like this.... KEY DedicatedServerName "" in the iCDB section.
You should also ensure that the iCDBMonitor is not set to Autorun... for windos and Linux this script will kill it.
SET KEY_NAME=iCDB Server Monitor
reg delete HKEY_CURRENT_USER\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\Run /v "%KEY_NAME%" /f
I would also invoke the iCDBServerMonitor and/or the iCDBServerManager for statistics. There's a config file for each of the following: Client, Launcher, Server, ServerManager and ServerMonitor in your wdir. Those also bear looking into.
Good luck! Please post what you find.
Why do you think Server Monitor may be a cause here, it monitors running services it doesn't influence project settings, do you have evidence that this is not the case? If so please log them with Mentor so they can be addressed.
I didn't think it was the cause, but standard debugging techniques dictate that you reduce the number of variables or possibilities for cause.